Oops! I guess it was bound to happen at some point. Twelve years of marriage has been full of ups and downs, and we have been so entrenched in the daily minutia and unexpected stresses of living that our anniversary clean slipped by without our notice.
He actually remembered before I did, which is highly unusual. He was even worried that I might have been giving him hints and was mad. This of course was not the case. The conversation went like this:
Him: “I realized something while I was out there.” (There being Scarowinds where he had gone to help chaperon the night before.)
Me joking: “That you’re a bad man?”
Confused, and slightly worried look from me.
Him: “I forgot our wedding anniversary.”
Me: “Huh? Oh! Oops! Me too. I forgive you.”
Him: “Oh, good!” Big sigh.
Hysterical laughter from us both in the kitchen.
Do I feel badly that I forgot? Only slightly.
It isn’t that I don’t think it’s important, but it was kind of nice not to have gone through all the built up expectation and ultimate disappointment that usually accompany our wedding anniversary. With everything else we’ve had going on we really didn’t need the extra stress.
We’ve been busy attending to our children, working, and taking care of our house. We’ve been leaning on one another, talking, and planning. We’ve been too busy being together to worry about how long we have been together.
Then it passed us by and we were too busy continuing on together.
Standing in our kitchen, laughing about forgetting our wedding anniversary without anyone being angry about it was the best feeling.
I think about the expectations that most people have, the same ones I’ve been guilty of indulging in, and I wonder why. In the twelve years I’ve been married to this man, we have never been in a position to do anything spectacular for our anniversary. We have two kids, and we have never been able to retain a babysitter long. Neither of us have any family within an hour’s drive to call on. We do everything either as a family or tag team.
I know there are people who would say that if you want something you have to work for it, and I agree. Life isn’t perfect. Most perfect moments are manufactured at great cost of energy, stress, and money. However, with everything that my husband and I have been dealing with lately it’s a cost we can’t really afford.
So we went grocery shopping as a family, and ordered pizza for dinner. That was treat enough. Two weeks late.
We’re still together, still working as a team. We’ve been married for twelve years. It hasn’t all been smooth sailing, even now the seas are kind of rough for us, but we are doing it together our way.
Have you ever forgotten your wedding anniversary? How was your favorite anniversary celebrated?